– I feel like I’m in self-destruct mode, like I’m pushing everyone and everything I care about away. I’m just annoyed.
A few thoughts: You never really experience peace until you have it.
The guy I was talking to, his excuses were kind of pathetic, “rubbish at texting” he should have made more of an effort then.
My next seven years of life should be full of excitement, independence and adventure – cant be tied down so you miss out on finding your true potential in life.
Saying that, I still have a hopeful heart about him, maybe I need to pray for God to remove that – it may be a hindrance to my personal growth.
At least me texting him what I did, means that there is closure – I no longer feel compelled to holla at him or expect him to text and get upset when he doesn’t.
Things I have learnt whilst seeing him – even things someone else pointed out which in itself is more encouraging– more caring.
Captain America – Bravery – “A weak man knows the value of strength and compassion.”
Don’t remember the date: – Funniest thing – Joyce Meyer was just preaching a sermon on TV; Eastenders was on at the same time but I came downstairs and heard Joyce and I just felt compelled to listen. She was talking about how we need to recognise our weaknesses so we know what they are so we know to call on God to pray for Him to work His strength in them through His grace. She was also talking about humility and pride and how it is important that we study it because pride can be a route of sin. She also touched on the fact that God puts us through trials so that we can call on Him.
2 Corthinthians 12 – But the funniest thing was that she mentioned the book of Job – what I’ve reading. She read from Job 10 + Job 33 and said that sometimes we need to go through trials to strengthen our weakness working on the fruits of the spirit. Seeds which need to be exercised (I feel like that’s exactly what I went through with this guy).
Just made me think of my situation with this guy and how I felt that it was a trial and how I have learnt stuff from it one most importantly having patience and faithfulness; whilst being with him I also experienced a lot of joy and learning on God for the most part.
A part of me feels like I’ve been hasty and made a wrong decision but I truly feel like I consulted God and didn’t jump into the decision straight away and I also believe that if God wants us to be together He will make it happen nothing is impossible from Him, He can do anything from someone’s mistakes. If not then I am faithful he had something better planned for our lives.
TheReadyWriter 